Wednesday, April 14, 2010

LOST JOHNNY

UNDERNEATH THE CITY THE ALLIGATORS SING
OF HOW THE FOOL HE CANNOT DANCE
WHEN SOMEONE CUTS THE STRINGS
CAN YOU GET THE MORPHINE?
TRY TO BE SO BREIF
LOST JOHNNYS OUT THERE LOOKING FOR RELIEF

Its been a while since I posted on here and I feel better when I write so here I am.

Listening to Motorhead whilst housesitting in the quiet suburbs of Woranora Heights. Its a serene suburb that epitomises the quiet surburban life of the Sutherland Shire. I want/need out ASAP. Id rather be wiping the grit of the city from my drooping, bloodshot eyes than wave to my neighbour as I cut my lawn.

I live not far from this area and travel to work in the Inner West. I am a wine merchant. I smile, press buttons on old computers and talk with a smile as I pump the populace full of alcohol. I charge it to the credit card and hope they enjoy their purchase. They think they are getting a real bargain. I worry about my weekly statistics. My calls-to-sales ratio. My conversion rate. My cases per hour. My average revenue per hour. I think of how I can improve these things to unlock an "over-achievers" model and achieve higher comission rates. I feel like a cog in a system I hate. I want to break down in such a way that the machine collapses around me.

Fuck the free world.

Sunday, March 15, 2009

WE ARE THE GODFORSAKEN HEIL.

Sitting at my girlfriends, stokin her laptop and declaring it a Reagan Youth Day. Thats pretty much the best start to any blog and I'm frothing right now.

WE ARE REAGAN YOUTH.
REAGAN YOUTH.
REAGAN YOUTH, SIEG HEIL.

Its kinda the song you want to cover, maybe even change the lyrics to make it a little more modern however you also don't wanna come off all wanky and ruin a great song. The prices we pay in this life. Geez.

Friday night was Taipan and Deathcage. Wasn't a bad night at all. Caught up with the gang and some peeps I haven't seen in a while before Deathcage came one. Spider turned a half-hallway into a makeshift rockstar dressing room and did a little jiggle and jive with his mic to hype himself. Maybe if he hung a drape and got a makeup artist such a display could have his band supporting Airbourne and playing stadiums in no time? Could possibly suit his cute little pout-and-flex when the cameras come out? Haha, despite my jokes they still a good band and put on a great set. Spit, punches, beer and water was all over everyone and we were enjoying watching a hippie dance about all weird and get smashed about by punks. His little hemp handbag ripped and personal effects including nail polish, coins, hippy belt, chalk, and god knows what else spilled everywhere. When the coins were handed back to him he was swallowing them. Admittedly there wasn't a great deal of chest beating about muscled up punks/skins smashing a wasted hippie (kinda like kicking a child, funny but don't make a career out of it!) but having said that it was funny as shit and the whole spectacle was great. I had my bus hammer out and enjoyed uncorordinated drunk moshing and being covered in beer.
Between set I got corrected on one of my misconceptions about GAUZE by a guy at the bar and I made pitstops between the Lansdowne and The Broardway Cafe where my girlfriend and her friend were drinking cocktails that tasted like fruity port. Was supposed to be a couples night as her friend brought the better half out but I decided to be all UP THE PUNX and ducked out here and there to check bands. I am a bad boyfriend and I'm suprised my girlfriend hasn't put my nuts in a vice over it. (love you Cait :D).

Taipan were up next and were just as good. People moshing alot and throwing leftover hippie coins. They covered NIGHTSTALKER and everyone just had to kill someone. A skinny Tammworth native known as Admo got the mic and went crazy everywhere. Tables and chairs were thrown. A bunch of chicks against the wall copped a barstool to their heads. My bus hammer found a rib or two and some gym-king lookin dude pulled up Admo from taking a pool cue to mosh with. Saw a mate grab a bouncer/barstaff and pussh him from side to side with no regard. I loved it. Total lawlessness and if all gigs were like that I'd probably shave my head and mosh with a chain.
One little question but. Seemed people went crazy for Nightstalker more than the other songs. I'd even go a little further and say some people were only there just waiting for the cover. How would the band feel about this? Does it matter? Is that poserism or going for what you know? A point for the future I guess.

LETS ALL SHOOT SOME SPEED.
LETS GET REALLY WIRED.
LET'S ALL SPEED FOR A COUPLE OF DAYS.
I'VE BEEN AWAKE NOW AND I'M NOT TIRED.

Back off to Denman tomorrow for driving, driving, driving and job searching. I hate the place but the comfort of my room is soothing as hell, even if it is stuffy and small. More downloading, more mail ordering. The records grow, the iPod fills, the death of mankind is coming and the soundtrack is a mixtape of my records and my hard drive.
Stay sexy.

Monday, March 9, 2009

Everything You Ever Learned.....

Judge from the Left for Dead title and try to assume my mood. Due to disasterous movements across my personal life over various shit I find my mood hitting a point where it's both desperate, angry and most importantly VOLITILE. It's like Jack the Ripper crawled into my head and is whispering ideas into the back of my brain. Everyday life is a disease and the only thing worse than a routine life is a break in the routine with no backup track to walk. And I fear thats where I'm heading. My moods flow in and out like tides. Happy and calm one minute, panic stricken the next followed in some random order by desperation, isolation and some other emotion that I can't really describe. Some sort of cross between sadness, guilt, anger, and apathy mixed together in a big brewing pot aptly labled "RAGE".

My life hasn't gone to plan over these last 2 months and other than getting the hours up on my P's things have moved slowly. I NEED a job, I NEED a place to stay. Even trying to fit in with the modern world at times makes me want to just drop out and hit the needle. If ones life could be an everlasting nose hovering over a mirror then by far and large its up, up and away until your so fucked that you black out before you start falling back down anyways.
To look at the rat race that all are expected to burn themselves out in is nauseating. No wonder people beat their chest proudly about being part of the criminal element. Who would be a working class sucker for $70k a year salary around people you hate when you could be worth a million in the street and have the same raw power and the element of violent action that most regular people wish they could harness themselves?

Other than rediscovering Australia's own PAUL KELLY I've also been blasting a lot of Raised Fist, Motorhead, 86 Mentality, Napalm Hearts, Stanley Knife, Iron Cross and Crude SS. Great bands them so you'd do well to download SOULSEEK (google it) and get addicted to some true raw power.

My dreams I hope will be of calm soothing themes but most likely I'll brood on the events of the past week and rendezvouz with my nightly contemplation of the great end. Death scares me beyond measure. Your whole life is like being sucked into a black hole: nothing can prevent the inevitable end of obliteration and the only real thing to do is have a pleasant journey on the way there. Ultimate hopelessness. Makes me wonder slightly about those self help motivational speakers. Can you really take control of your life when sickness, aging, and the will of others effectivly dominate its whole span of existance until the natural forces that be turn off your switch? Its soothing to think of death the way they portray it in GLADIATOR. your dying moment in slow motion till you way up in a summer field with your loved ones. Completely removed from all earthly worries. For some reason it brings to my mind waking up in a rainforest and hearing everything from birds to monkeys chirping and screaming about in natural serenity. Takes away all fear until the reality of the unknown steps back in. What if it all just ends? No salvation, no spirit, no wonderland to retreat to. A panicked last minute of life before the big plunge into a great nothingness.
Julius Caesar was right. The only true afterlife, the only true existance after death is legacy. Derivitives of his name are used for the titles of Kings. He is know even now for conquests and famous battles. And his last moments were spent being stabbed to death by his friends. A frenzied last moment with the satisfaction of knowing that his name wouldn't simply slip into obscurity but live on for the ages to learn from.
0.001% of people have this satisfaction. The rest of us will be thrown on the scrapheap to rot out before the deathrattle has even left our throats. Give up.

I cant think of anything else to vent. With that I crawl off to bed to crash like a wreck and fall asleep with my iPod in my ears. Something soft and mellow. My head and heart are still raging and inside its felt like lions and lambs have laid down to sleep but neither dare shut their eyes. Its going to be a long night ahead of me. Someone shoot me now. Ergh.

Monday, January 19, 2009

FLYING HIGH AGAIN

My PC has shat itself and I have to take it to a fellow nerds house to fix it up. So I'm stuck on my mothers PC listening via iPod to all my favorites and just metaling it up and wondering why the fuck people still wear latex like its 1983. Most of this blog will jsut be OZZY lyrics from assorted songs because thats all I feel like typing. Like covering a song but easier.

CRAZY BUT THATS HOW IT GOES.
MILLIONS OF PEOPLE LIVING AS FOOLS.
MAYBE ITS NOT TO LATE
TO LEARN HOW TO LOVE AND FORGET HOW TO HATE?
MENTAL WOUNDS NOT HEALING, LIFES A BITTER SHAME.
I'M GOING OFF THE RAILS ON A CRAZY TRAIN.

Anyone see those OZZY OSBOURNE adverts about World Of Warcraft? Fuck, its corny as shit and gimmicky as fuck but I was still frothing. Maybe I'm too much of a fanboy over stuff I'm into? Who knows. I'll still rely on him later to carry me through the early hours of the morning when I crawl off to bed and bang my head against the pillow in a violent fashion to my iPOD mixes.

YOU GOTTA BELIEVE IN SOMEONE.
ASKING ME WHO IS RIGHT.
ASKING ME WHO TO FOLLOW?
DON'T ASK ME: I DON'T KNOW.

Managed to get ahold of 40 cans of soft drink for SIXX BUCKS. No wank brands either, all Pepsi, Coke Zero, Solo (even the Lemon and Lime variant) and all that jazz. All loose cans that were ment to be in the vending machine or fell off the crates I guess. Some of them smell and taste like a mix of woodglue and sawdust that makes some of the drinks taste like they got homemade vodka in it. I'm not complaining but; for that value I'm willing to look past possible poisioning/cancer.

HOWLING IN SHADOWS.
LIVING IN A LUNAR SPELL.
HE FINDS HIS HEAVEN
SPEWING FROM THE MOUTH OF HELL.
AND WHEN HE FINDS WHO HES LOOKING FOR
LISTEN IN AWE AND YOU'LL HEAR HIM
BARK AT THE MOON.

I actually ahvent picked up my bass in a good month or so for a decent session and I'm feeling like a bad husband. If my guitar was a wife she'd be rooting the poolboy by now and I'd be looking at an expensive court settlement that would see me lose my house, my kids and my money. Yeouch. I plan to betray my girl at some point for a new one anyways, thinking BC Rich or another Ashton. Nothing to expensive, just something to thrash the shit out of. Also need to look into a new amp. And the money for this? Maybe I'll sex myself up and get a boobjob and suck some old man for the final years of his life to walk away with some future security. Could work.

OVER AND OVER; ALWAYS TRIED TO GET AWAY
LIVING IN A DAYDREAM; ONLY PLACE I HAD TO STAY
FEVER OF A BREAKOUT BURNING IN ME MILES WIDE
PEOPLE AROUND ME TALKING TO THE WALLS INSIDE

I really need a band and to get more zines out. For now though its records, internet poker and tetris. Fun times.

Friday, January 16, 2009

DON'T STOP BELIEVING: HOLD ON TO THAT FEELING.

The weeks have drawn to a close and my Sopranos marathon have ended. Yesterday I finished the last episode and unlike a lot of other people I fucking LOVE the ending. "Don't Stop Believing" by Journey (played in the very last scene) has been ringing in my head every since the scene ended and I'm still in awe of the 86 hours I spend dedicated to this box set. Maybe I need to get out more? I would If I had a job like Tony Soprano. A lot of the people in that show get strangled or shot in the back of the head but 10 years of easy living with their power and money would probably be worth it anyways. Still tossing up on my favorite scene. Ritchie Aprile being fed through a meat cutter? Phil Leotardo being shot then having a car run over his head? The young Moltisanti being suffocated? Maybe, but the less gory scenes jumped at me more. The final scene of the Soprano family united is probably going to stick in my scene most. The constant scene flashes towards the door and people coming in and out to the diner and the in depth screening of everyone in the diner I think is ment to be seen through Tony's eyes. His position means he can see all exists and the toilet thus giving him the booth view that all mobsters and gangsters use. I think the tension of the whole scene as to sizing everyone up shows the tension that Don Soprano would have experienced every day as boss. Great scene. B est show in a very long time and two years on I'm STILL pissed off its gone.
THe cancellation of series like ROME do naught but rub salt into the wounds. Most people are dumbasses and their lack of intelect to grab onto something that isnt gore is to blame I feel. I take the moral high ground because I laugh at everything from historical quiffs to vulgar language to sex jokes to old people falling. Its all humor but at least I keep it broard.
All in all I'm going to be walking round dropping Paulie Walnuts quotes for a while to come. SO DUN'T BREAK MY BAWWWWLLLS YEW COCKSUCKIN LIL' PRICK.

Been spinning the new Extortion 7" TERMINAL CANCER alot. I'm rating it dude, recorded on an 8 track and it sounds like they printed it on the sleeve: RAW AS PISS. THe lyrical content is pretty grim and this dude possibly could be succumbing to the septic seething outlook and grizzly topics that make Extortion what they are? It'd sure be fitting if he snapped and went on a shopping mall rampage or was found to be a serial killer with the personality and vicious streak of Ted Bundy but the methods and playtime attitude of Ed Gein. Or maybe even Andrei Chikatilo? The kill count of that guy would do enough to rock Australia and suit the music a hell of a lot better.
Deathcage FROM DESPAIR TO WHERE 7" is a win too. I enjoy this band live and I'm keen to see them with AVO at the end of the month at the Sando. Deathside worship with added elements, not for the average scenster. And by that I mean flatbrims.
Have some limited edition "bloodsplatter" SLAYER vinyl now. All the 4 releases except HELL AWAITS so just gotta keep my eyes peeled for more to add to the collection.
I'd also reccomend the new AVO 12" DOMESTIC VIOLENCE KEEPS THE NEIGHBOURHOOD QUIET. Its ballsy and gutsy as shit and actually makes me thing of people spitting their teeth out on all fours at a pub. Great stuff.

Was at the final "IA" show a week back or so. What a wank. I didn't even pay to get up but who wants to see a band when only 1 member of the band is actually there? I just couldnt force myself to give money to that 50 Lions crap and I didnt froth on the average joe who rocked up to that show. Call me a metalhead faggot on the fringe whatever. Merch with AK47's/slogans like DEFEND HARDCORE show that a band sucks in my opinion and some of the types there really just seemed boring people.
This was put into context for me by my sleeveless denim being pointed out. Well as far as I'm concerned sleeveless denim is hardly hip nor trendy. It wont make chicks want to fuck you and dudes wount think your setting a standard, repeling all trendies and scensters. It acts as a billboard saying what bands you are into and musically where your coming from way more effectively than a T-shirt can (and that is of course why we wear band shirts) and that for me is what its all about. You can stereotype me and label me from a room away and leave me to paint myself in my corner and in this scene you can change your "flavor of self" 90 million times over before I've even taken the fucker off.
YOu can throw the opposite point that my sleeveless is jsut like a band shirt but I don't see it that way. From the hassle of getting one then seaching for patches then sewing them all on? Thats more than just an extra $20 at a show and a hell of a lot more passion. Punks/metalheads united in this fact closer than they can ever see. You can rip my argument to pieces a million times over but its just how I see it.
Despite all this I still dig IA. Just not the one man band theory haha.

I look at stuff like that I write and I cop flak for being negative or "jaded". Fist of all I haven't been around long enough to be "jaded" Been going to big shows since 12-13 and over the years the shows ahve gotten smaller and smaller but even then I wouldn't say I have the right to be jaded. Fanzines are ok but I've never been in a band releasing shit and I think other than time and effort thats an important step you have to take (as if you'd actually WANT to be jaded anyways) before making these claims.
Theres also still a LOT I get psyked on in current punk and metal circles. LOts of bands I've got my eyes on and can't wait to hear from so dont get me wrong, I'm just a bully at times I know but I support my scenes much more than I verbally detract from them.

Just as pressing an issue is that of my friends has had my skateboard for a month and a half now in a town I've never even been to. Believe it or not I will seek vengance and hunt it down if its the last thing I do. Walking is for suckers: quadraplegics have the right idea in more ways that one with stuff like this. Also switched on by having a chick in a nurses outfit wipe your ass and feed you. I'm rating it for sure; god give me a carcrash or something!

Thats all from me now. Keep it loose, kids.

THE SOPRANOS January 10th, 1999 - June 10th, 2007

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Wednesday, December 17, 2008

YOU ARE ONE.

Today has been a bit boring. Minor small things have been the filler. I forgot how much I loved Nong Shim Shin Ramyun noodles and have been snacking like a snack Nazi. No bullshit just nomnomnomnomnomnomnom. I need to get back into working out because at this rate even my superior metabolism wont keep up and I will become Jabba the Hutt in a month or two. And wont that be fucking amazing....
Living at home is fucking gay. I really cant wait to move out. I wanna walk around my house naked eating food and listening to music but instead I gotta keep the noise down and take shorter showers (whilst my parents are around). I'm 21 in January and I've currently reverted back to being 16. From here its off to Sydney but so I'm not complaining. Also, why the fuck does everyone call Sydney SIN CITY? Yeh its sketchy as fuck but the people who call it that normally are the most timid, reserved people who really have nothing sketchy about them or around them? How does that work? Are you some little Viet gangster living out at Cabbra? Do you own an ice den at Fairfield? Sling a bit of white magic out Parramatta way?
Tattoos don't make you "sketchy" either. Fuck I could give my Silky Terrier a tattoo and it wouldn't fucking turn it into a rottweiler now would it?
The only thing worse that the above mentioned articles are North shore wankers posing as gangsters with the $700 phone that mum bought for them in all designer clothes mouthing off at strangers from the safety of their group then running off home when mum gives em a buzz for dinner. They can suck it too. Only good thing about Mosman was that granny killer and I'd like nothing more than to ambush Bondi Junction with an MG42. I'd be the ANGEL OF DEATH-FOR-PEOPLE-WHOS-PANTS-COST-NO-LESS-THAN-$350!
Brutal.
In the last few days I sure have been getting my NERD on and just playing RTS and FPS games over the net. I'm killing, I'm wounding, I'm pwning. Run at me.

On a side note, other than driving and cooking today I have been moshing down my house to UNITY. Wow, I've been a fan this band for ages but fuck me sideways this band is great.
YOU ARE ONE!

Later skaters.
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Tuesday, December 16, 2008

The Shit I Say When I'm Drunk.....

Reading last blog...wow. Maybe I'm bitter about high school and 17-18 year old smart arses? I need to chill out more.

Nothing THAT Good.....

I am drunk and taking time to correct this 1 million times over. I got back from an 18th. Before embarking on this celebration I had images of glassing and stomping bullies and supposed "mad cunts from school. It never eventuated so I was disappointed with a whole audience to offend so I picked on some Austrian chick and told her whole county was a derivative of Germany thus she should just conform. She got pissed off. It was funny and I was satisfied. Fuck Austria, they are secondary to the REAL Reich!
I am listening to TRAGEDY. I want to beat someone and tell them to listen to me but I have nothing to say and I don't know why? Some cunt in a metro shirt questioned me on a dude I know and another dude I know jumped in being a total mad cunt too. In this sense I miss Armidale because there was no bullshit with conversation. There was no wankery and everyone in my circle and in my crew knew where they stand and didn't talk shit. If these people are the outside world then I'm fucked haha.

I want to watch blood and violence. None of that here so I'm substituting for beer. If my girlfriend was here I'd froth but instead I will drink and mosh. Have fun.